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by vyckie bennett

Alright, I can hear you snickering ... "Who me? The perfect body? What a joke!" Hippo hips. Thick thighs. Pale, blemished skin. Bloating and flab everywhere. And don't even mention the horrible hair, okay? The truth is, most likely you are so disgusted with your body that you could just scream, "My body is hideous!"

How do I know that you hate your body? Body image dissatisfaction is epidemic in our society. Count the number of girls you know who are not on a diet. In today's culture you cannot escape the relentless parade of perfectly endowed models and superstars lustily taunting us at the check-out stand, on the movie screen, and even in our own homes via the television and Internet.

The majority of girls and women (96%) do not match up to the models and actresses presented in the media. The average model is 5'10" and weighs 110 pounds, whereas the average woman is 5'4" and weighs 142 pounds. While awareness of this discrepancy between real women and the air-brushed, digitally enhanced seductress can be comforting, in reality most girls still feel compelled to live up to the unrealistic ideal.

The Pornographic Mind

"If we place pornography and the tyranny of slenderness alongside one another we have the two most significant obsessions of our culture, and both of them focused upon a woman's body." -Kim Chernin

The media's ruthless saturation of dreamlike beauties everywhere we look is calculated to instill among both sexes a sense of dissatisfaction of women. It is designed to trap women in the impossible pursuit of physical perfection. It is designed to entice men into more lurid forms of pornography. This evil campaign has been profitable indeed.

In a poll by People magazine 80% of women reported that the images of women on TV, in movies, fashion magazines and advertising make them feel insecure about their looks. In addition, the poll indicated that women are
made to feel so insecure that they are willing to try diets that pose health risks (34%), go "under the knife" (34%) and 93% indicated they had made various and repeated attempts to lose weight to measure up to the images.

Promise Keepers reports that one out of three men who attended its rallies in 1996 admitted they "struggle" with pornography. 63% of men attending "Men, Romance & Integrity Seminars" admit to struggling with porn in the past year. Two-thirds are in church leadership and 10% are pastors. (Source: Pastor's Family Bulletin, Focus on the Family, March 2000)

That's a lot of perversion, young ladies - and we're talking about church-going men here. With such a high percentage of the men "struggling" with pornography, is it any wonder that their wives are perpetually dieting, dressing immodestly and obsessing about their looks? The next time you think about that insanely skinny lady at church don't get jealous - rather, have sympathy because most likely she is desperately jumping through the degrading hoops of perversion in an effort to please her porn-addicted man.

Will You Marry a Porn Addict?

If you accept our culture's ideal of what constitutes beauty then you will attract sexually sick men like a magnet. Men of integrity have "made a covenant" with their eyes (Job 31:1) so do not have a warped, unrealistic picture of what a beautiful girl should look like - they do not expect to marry a Barbie doll. These guys will be the godly, nurturing husbands who won't look for greener pastures as soon as the flower of your youth begins to fade. A faithful spouse will not pressure you to be unnaturally thin - he will not require you to perform increasingly depraved sexual acts in order to satisfy his twisted lusts.

What I'm saying here is that unless you learn to accept and even love your body as God created it, odds are you will end up in a relationship with a porn addict. If you don't want to be attractive to perverts, do not be perverted in your own thoughts. How much better to have the mind of Christ?

A woman's body is truly a beautiful thing - YOUR BODY is a fabulous display of God's craftsmanship!

Your Genes Determine the Size of Your Jeans

Have you noticed how much you resemble your parents? Truthfully, that's not such a bad thing. Psalm 68:6 tells us that "God sets the solitary in families." It is painful to be lonely - but every time you look in the mirror remember that you are never truly alone. You are an integral part of a family that will always come through for you when the chips are down. During the major events of your life - graduation, marriage, childbirth, hospitalization, and death - your family will be there for you. They are God's blessing to you. Learn to appreciate them.

Your dad thinks you're drop-dead gorgeous. Now don't be rolling your eyes - you know it's true. Be grateful that no matter what trials you face you always have the assurance that at least one man will always admire you.

Your mom would give her life for yours. She has a tie to your heart that no human other than your future husband and children can possibly rival. She knows the real you and she thinks you're great. Oh sure, she always has "suggestions" for how you might improve this thing or that about yourself - but even this criticism is proof that she cares. She wants the very best for you.

Do you have your Aunt Stacey's nose? Grandpa's bushy eyebrows? Mom's pointy chin? Be proud that you bear the marks of your ancestors in your body for they testify that you belong - you are a part of something larger than yourself. Sisters and brothers, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins - not only do you share the same physical features, but also the same culture: experiences, traditions, stories and habits. The temptation is to seek your own independent identity apart from these influences, but the truth is that who you are is a composite of the rich culture that is your family. As an individual you will add your unique qualities to that culture, but it is futile to think that you can completely separate your "self" from your roots. Out of the millions of women on this planet He could have chosen, God placed you in your mother's womb - trust His wisdom and embrace the family He has given you.

Thin is In? No - Gaunt is Ghastly

Fashion models are getting thinner every year - is this really attractive? When dieting, it is usually the fat stored in the thighs that is the last to go. In order to have twigs for thighs, these covergirls lose all the weight in their faces - their eyes are sunken and their cheeks hollow. They have a sharp, angular look that is cold and hard. Their necks and shoulder bones protrude in a manner that appears painful. When we see similar pictures of starving children in Third World countries we do not feel envious - we want to help feed these malnourished people!

Sports advertisements portray slim, muscular bodies as a picture of health. But are thin women truly more healthy? Many of these models have so little body fat that they cease to ovulate. Now you may thinking it would be a dream come true if only your monthly cycles would go away - but actually fertility is a blessing from God and a sign of good health.

Your hips and thighs are part of His wonderful plan for procreation. Women with narrow pelvises have much more difficulty in childbearing, sometimes necessitating surgical deliveries. University of Colorado researchers reported recently that thigh fat is often linked to lower rates of "metabolic syndrome," a cluster of risk factors for diabetes and heart disease that includes high levels of sugar and bad cholesterol in the blood.

It is only modern culture that perceives the bean-pole figure as flattering. Take a peek in your picture Bible at the Garden of Eden - notice how the artist imagines Eve, the "perfect woman." She has curves - ample hips and thighs, her stomach is not flat. Notice the size of her feet - they look proportionate to support the weight of her body.

From the Victorian Age we learn that the attractive women were "pleasingly plump" - soft and cushiony. The poor, low-caste women could not afford the meat, dairy, fresh fruits and vegetables that the titled ladies enjoyed. It was not considered attractive if a woman had to work in the sun so her skin became dark and leathery in contrast to the lovely, pale Snow White.

Even in more modern times men have not always drooled over waif-like creatures. The women that were considered the "ideal beauties" in the 1940's and 1950's like Marilyn Monroe (size 14) and Mae West were full-bodied and truly beautiful women, but they would be considered "overweight" by today's standards.

WOMBman - You're Amazing!

The term "feminist" is misleading because the women's lib movement is not so much about elevating the status of females as it is about denying the very essence of what it means to be feminine - that is to have a womb. Before puberty it can be difficult to tell just by looking whether a fully dressed child is a boy or girl. They're both pretty much straight as sticks. But when a young woman's body begins to function normally as designed by God, the difference quickly becomes apparent.

Young ladies "blossom" and "fill out." It's a pity that so many girls at this age develop poor posture because standing tall might reveal more of their bust than they care to publicly acknowledge. Now, I'm not saying you should flaunt it - but please don't be ashamed of the size or shape of your "budding figure." The Lord instructs the married man to be satisfied with his own wife's breasts. He is not embarrassed to include that admonition in His Word because the truth is women have breasts and that's a beautiful thing.

One day, you will nourish your newborn baby at your breast. When that happens you will be in awe of the incredible privilege you have as a woman to nurture and bond with your child - in fact, you will feel sorry for your poor husband who has no breasts and can never experience the tenderness of nursing a baby. The truth of this statement will be evident when your baby or toddler is tired, ill or gets an "owie" - she will want only one person - Mommy!

Another aspect of your maturing body which may not exactly thrill you is your monthly cycle. The bloating, cramping and the mess are enough to make anyone long to have been born male. But this business of the womb is really a fabulous occurrence which young ladies should welcome as a sign of good health and a normally functioning body which is doing exactly what God designed it to do.

Consider a mother preparing a place in which to lay her newborn baby - does she make the bassinet hard and cold? No, she lines the bed with soft, cushy blankets so her child will be warm and cozy. This is exactly what your body is doing every month as it prepares a luxurious environment in which to grow a baby. That bloaty feeling is the lining of your womb with a special layer of padding and nourishment. If it turns out that no baby arrives to take up residence in the comfortable nest you've prepared it will not do to let that space stagnate and grow cobwebs - no, you must clean house! So your body sweeps the womb clean and begins again to prepare a fresh cradle.

But why go to all the bother when you are unmarried and not in immediate need of a place to carry your baby? Just because you are cycling does not mean that you are already fertile - your body needs time and practice in order to mature. When you see your body functioning as it ought to, be thankful because you can rest assured that your body will know just what to do when it comes time to carry and deliver your babies. When you feel the first quickening of a tiny baby fluttering inside your womb, you will appreciate the knowledge that you can trust your body to do it's miraculous work.

"Okay, I Can Accept My Body ... but I Definitely Don't LOVE It!"

Many young ladies today are losing the body battle to poor health. If you are truly overweight (as opposed to possessing the natural curves of a normal woman), have unsightly skin problems, get sick easily, or lack energy then you must pay attention to your overall health. Forget about the latest diet craze and don't bother with all the "health and beauty" products promoted on the tube.

Good health is fairly simple and it begins with a clean conscience before God. "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine." (Prov. 17:22) You cannot be truly happy if your spirit is vexed through disobedience and rebellion against God. One of the Lord's promises to the faithful is the blessing of good health. Do you want to be beautiful? Get your heart right with God.

On a physical level, it is important to consume lots of water, get plenty of sleep, exercise regularly, maintain proper dental hygiene and eat a balanced diet.

Water is God's beauty treatment for women. Be sure to drink at least 8 glasses per day - skip on the pop and other flavored drinks as they only add calories but do not benefit your health. Taking baths or showers will also hydrate you and being clean can only make you more attractive. Much of your complexion problems can be cleared by simply washing your face daily with plain water. No need to purchase fancy facial products which might cause allergic reactions and actually make the problem worse. Just wash your face every day - twice a day if it gets really greasy.

Make it your goal to get to sleep at least by 10 p.m. The earlier the better as sleep before midnight is more rejuvenating to your body than sleeping late in the morning. This will be especially true as you grow older - do not waste your excess energy on late-night projects after the babies are in bed. Go to sleep and use that energy to heal from the physical stress of pregnancy and childbirth.

When I say "exercise" I'm not talking about a rigorous athletic regimen. Just keep moving and you'll be fine. Walking is the best exercise of all so make it a regular habit to take a walk first thing in the morning or in the evenings after supper. In cold weather it's helpful just to walk around the house - if your home has a flight of stairs, all the better.

Nothing improves a girls looks more than a bright, sincere smile. Now, don't rush out to buy whitening strips! You can have white teeth without all that expense and there's no need to risk poisoning yourself with bleach. After brushing thoroughly with toothpaste, just brush a couple of extra minutes with plain water or a bit of baking soda. A beautiful smile comes from the heart. Forget about yourself for a moment and truly appreciate the people around you - admire their talents and enjoy their company.

If you need to lose weight, do not starve yourself! When you skip meals your body actually clings to its stored fat all the more in anticipation of famine. Rather than counting calories or obsessing about fat content, simply eat smaller portions of the foods you like. I once read a story about a girl on a "rubber band diet." She cut rubber bands into small pieces and sprinkled them on top of her meal. This forced her to pick around the rubber bands in order to get a forkful of food. By the time she managed to get several good mouthfuls, she had lost her appetite and quit eating. I don't recommend this - but the principle is helpful - eat less and you will lose weight.

If you get the munchies, chew gum. The reason people who quit smoking often gain weight is that their mouths are no longer occupied, so they stuff them full of food. Gum chewing is a much more healthful occupation than munching junk food - just be sure to be ladylike as you chew!

I'll Say It Again ... You Have the Perfect Body

Young lady, your body is God's glorious creation. He determined your genetic makeup and the environmental factors which would influence who you are today. Your body is perfectly suited to accomplish His purposes in your life. Maybe you have absolutely no idea what His purpose could be for placing you in a family with low metabolism or short, stubby fingers. Relax! You don't have to figure all of this out. Content yourself to be exactly the person God wants you to be - YOU!

What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. (1Co 6:19, 20)